New beer doesn't float my bloat

Once again I have been given an excuse to laugh at the insanity of certain breweries that are spending millions on creating ‘female-friendly brews’. Today’s beer funny comes from Molson Coors who have recently invested over $A1.5million developing a “bloat resistant” beer which, according to their marketing department, will have women flocking towards beer and turning their backs to wine… ha, ha. While the article I read about this so-called gas reducing beer does not categorically state that women don’t drink beer due to their perception of it being bloating, it does mention that this beer will help address some of the factors that may hinder beer’s appeal to women.

A gratuitous photo of a sexy flat stomach to accompany the story

Carlsberg also recently launched what they are calling a unisex beer in the hope that the packaging will appeal to women. Neither of these two farcical ideas are going to work if the beer still tastes bad!

There are certain misconceptions surrounding beer and anyone who has come along to one of my events, knows how I love nothing more than to bust a good beer myth. One of these myths is that ‘beer is bloating’. Now, I only wish the marketing geniuses at Molson Coors had found me and off-loaded some of the $1.5million my way. Here’s why… Beer as we know, is a carbonated beverage, as is champagne and soft drink (I’ve never heard of either of these 2 categories creating female-friendly, non-bloating varieties!). The fundamental difference between beer and champagne if we are going to compare alcoholic beverages is that champagne is rarely, if ever, consumed directly from the bottle, (race car drivers are one of our exceptions here!). When beer is consumed straight from the bottle, the CO2 contained within the beer will of course end up in the stomach, being provided with no other escape route. If the beer is poured into a glass, certain amounts of the CO2 gas will be released into the air (just don’t tell Julia what we are doing or we may find ourselves hit with our very own carbon tax), reducing the amount of carbonation reaching your stomach and reducing the bloating nature of the beer. Having said that, those beers that create their carbonation or CO2 through natural processes (CO2 is a natural bi-product of fermentation), and allow the beer a good amount of conditioning time, will tend to have a much finer, champagne-like bubble. These fine bubbles will cause far less of the bloat – little bubbles, little troubles!

As the challenge by the large breweries to continue their efforts to entice the sisterhood into beer (and grow their volume substantially if all goes to plan), with each brewery investing millions of dollars, I am often surprised at the strategies they employ and who must be conducting the research which leads them down these dubious paths they so often travel. Women do not need a girly beer, please stop with this condescending nonsense and speak to women who like beer and find out what it is about beer they like! I can’t imagine any woman who doesn’t like beer, suddenly embracing it because it is supposedly less bloating. Time and time again, I have said, there is nothing wrong with the liquid itself, it is how it is presented to women. Take it away from its blokedom territory, take the time to find out what style of beer may appeal to the individual (there is a beer style for everyone!), serve it in an elegant glass and voila, the breweries may just find that without any of the try-hard band-aid attempts, women will happily enjoy a good beer!

Molson Coors, my invoice is in the post!

If you would like to see what sort of beer women want to make, head along to True South this weekend to watch Kirrily and the Australian women of beer brew a collaboration beer, while you enjoy some excellent (and non-gender specific) beers and great food.

Details:

Brew day: Saturday 23rdJuly 2011
Location: True South Brewery, 298 Beach Road, Black Rock 3191
Time: Doors open at 11am – free entry
Lunch: $55.00 per head, traditional Argentinean BBQ including 1 beer is served at 1pm – BOOKINGS ESSENTIAL
Bookings:bookings@truesouth.comor1300 878360

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